I Can't Be President

Thu, 03/13/2008 - 3:06pm

As I was watching the news today, I figured out that I can never be president because I can't hear on airplanes. So every cross-country campaign leap would essentially be a media blackout.

Your turn. Why can't YOU be president?

I Can't Hear After Airplane Flights

By Patrick M McLeod

Thu, 03/13/2008 - 3:45pm

Thanks to some sinus congestion, I've still got pressure in both ears three days after my last flight.

That would never do in a campaign. Imagine the run-up to Iowa and New Hampshire: "McLeod looks puzzled when asked about (Iraq/ethanol/health care/New Hampshire's first-in-the-nation status)."

I'd be over before I began.

Because of democracy

By Stacie

Thu, 03/13/2008 - 3:56pm

Preliminary polls -- and my junior high school experience -- indicate I do not have the support of the American people.

Oh, right.

By Josh Berthume

Thu, 03/13/2008 - 4:03pm

I have that too.

Why?

By saramhejl

Thu, 03/13/2008 - 3:59pm

Because I would gain too much weight and have that fat, tired, stressed feeling all of the time. Looking at yourself in a hotel mirror in this state is the worst thing you can do for your psyche.